In a previous post we referenced "Three Americas," as a fourth alternative to a third party, "Splintering," or choosing a candidate by process of elimination. The "three Americas" are as follows:
1- The United States of America
2- The Peoples' Democratic Republic of America
3- Elysium Confederation
We will begin with the Elysium Confederation. The U.S.A. and the P.D.R.A. will be detailed in future posts.
"Elysium" would be composed of three of Venture Capitalist, Tim Draper's six Californias. Included in this 20 million strong nation would be West California, Silicon Valley and North California. The Capital would be San Francisco.
Chelsea Clinton would be handpicked to be Elysium's first president. She would be served by an advisory board that would include Californians Tom Steyer, Nancy Pelosi, Henry Waxman and Al Gore.
Over a bottle of Chardonnay(actually several bottles of Chardonnay), they would conceive a plan that would separate Elysium from the evils of a polluted and Eco-unfriendly world! It would begin by patiently explaining to Elysium subjects that "not everyone should be stewards of an automobile."
A $10,000 per year "Automobile usage contribution" would encourage subjects to discard personal automobile ownership and consider alternative transportation. The Elysium goverment would contract with the advisory board members, to establish "Elysium line," a electric train that would provide quality mass transist throughout the nation.
The "Fossil Fuel Dissolution Act," would add a 25% surcharge to all energy bills utilyzing fossil fuels. This would subsequently encourage the use of alternative energy sources such as Solar, Hydro and Wind.
In further efforts to conserve energy, Elysium subjects would be encouraged to occupy new, "green," apartment buildings. These superbly energy efficient quarters, would reduce unnecessary square footage, thus maximizing energy output per person. Water conservation would be increased because the need for toilets would be reduced.
The Bicycle would become the symbol of Elysium. Each bike purchase would gain a 20% tax credit. While Moped purchases would carry no tax credits, they would not require a usage contribution.
Industrial Hemp would become a key money crop for Elysium. Subjects would be encouraged to attire themselves in "one-piece I.H. coveralls," the unofficial uniform of Elysium.
President Bill Clinton would become the official spokesperson for the Vegan diet, encouraged for all Elysium subjects. This "no meat, no animal products" approach to healty lifestyles would be encouraged with a 25% surcharge on all meat and dairy products.
Elysium would be one of the world's top wine producing regions. As a result, plenty would be available for Elysium subjects. Recreational Marijuana would be endorced by the government as an alternative to distilled alcohol.
Sons of Massachusetts and honorary Elysium subjects, John Kerry and Ed Markey would be given a special place on the advisary board. So would Michelle and Barack Obama. Collectively, they would insure a clean, healthy, utopian existence for Elysium subjects.
No comments:
Post a Comment